We often hear our near and dear elderly ones saying that marriage is the most important part of a woman’s life. It is a relation after which her life changes completely. Why don’t people say the same thing about men? Why is it so? This is probably because after marriage, a woman is expected to adjust and compromise in a manner ‘that changes her life completely.’ From a very young age, girls are taught they will leave their parents’ home after marriage. It is ingrained in their minds that post-marriage they shall have to live according to the wishes of their husbands and in-laws. But why is it that a woman should leave her maternal house after she gets married? Why do people in our country still consider a daughter as a burden? In India, people use the term ‘parayadhan,’ meaning someone else’s property for daughters because one day they will be married and sent to another home. Why is it so? Why is a lady expected to use her husband’s surname? Every woman has an identity of her own and it cannot be reasonably expected of a person to be recognized by someone else’s name all the time. As a free woman, who has as many rights and liberties as a man; she can choose if she wants to use her husband’s surname or not. But women are hardly ever given this choice. People are flabbergasted if a woman says that she desires to use her maternal surname. Why is it so? It is always assumed that in a marital relationship, the bride will have to give up a flourishing career to take care of her home. But what is often overlooked is that it is not just ‘her’ home, it belongs to her husband as well; and he is equally responsible for it. Even today, the working-women are looked down upon by members of society as it is believed that they are incapable of looking after the house and raising children. Nowadays, women are as professionally competent as the menfolk. Why can’t women be considered a successful professional and an equally successful homemaker at the same time? Why is it so? These taboos have been prevailing since time immemorial. These opinions have so thoroughly been conditioned into our minds that any attempt to change them raises eyebrows. We have become so used to these practices and customs that even some of the women consider it a ‘sin’ to go against them. The feminist ideology has not been able to take firm roots in our nation because people lack initiative. We need to step up and ask ourselves the question- Why is it so?
About the Author: This article is contributed by Kudrat Agarwal, our Intern.